Scott's 2005 Portland Marathon Tree Hood River, OR Home
9 years ago I decided that the Boston Marathon was going to be tossed into my bucket list. My dream was quickly crushed when I failed to qualify in 2005 after the Boise Marathon by 5 minutes. In the years that followed I finished several marathons with times that were less than stellar. My poor performance was largely a result of an addiction to alcohol and pot that quickly took over my life. The idea of going to Boston was still lingering in the back of my clouded mind, but that is all it was. A clouded dream! I finished the 2012 Portland Marathon in poor performance and only ok health. My training quickly diminished in the months that followed and I went right back to my daily routine of over consuming alcohol and pot. When I started receiving sign up notifications in my inbox for the 2013 Portland Marathon I would discard each and every one of them. I was no longer driving my destiny. On 5/11/2013 I was hit with an epiphany en route to South Sister that changed my life as I know it. My higher power told me that I will end my life in a very gloomy and dark place if I continue using as I had been. On that day I realized that I had truly become powerless over my addiction and life was spiraling out of control. I have been clean for 23 days now and my spirit of the marathon has been re kindled. I have signed up for the 2013 Sun River Marathon, started mapping my plan and will begin seeking advice from those with experience that I do not have. I know this will be a hard goal to tackle, but there is no doubt in my mind. The Boston Marathon start line is now in my sights. It is no longer a clouded dream. "Doubt whom you will, but never yourself." - Christian Bovee
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The Present by Spencer Johnson was gifted to me in 2010 from my then mentor Ed and his wife Lil. It has taken me nearly three years to begin living in the present moment. I have read this book over and over again never finding the ability to think in the now. Today, that has all changed.
I certainly have times in my day during which stress about the past or future comes to mind. When these thoughts arise I must think about what is amazing right now. There are so many things in our lives to be thankful for. The Present is one! Summit as Friends! Scott Rowley
Daily Reflections!
A journey of a million miles has just begun. As I continue to travel down a my path of recovery and detoxication my mind opens to new thoughts, surroundings and environments. I do not find myself pissing countless dollars away just to fill an addiction. Rather I find myself filling my mind with positive energy. Today, I woke up and the first thought that popped into my mind was ----- "A powerful and positive day awaits. Rise up!" I spent much of my day consumed in the moment, which if you know me is something I rarely, if ever do. The outcome was amazing! I answered a question in less than 10 minutes that many people would certainly spend hours on and likely find no solution. Some would view this as me competing against them. I view it as me competing against myself. I am now driving the direction of my life to success rather than my addiction driving me to a dark place. My day had many successes as a result of my positive thinking and I know this is just the beginning. As success continues to present itself to my life I must find a way to hold a humble mentality and present myself as such, for if I do not I will certainly self destruct. In the last week and a half I have emptied my body of much of the negative energy that it was filled with. I have found a way to fill this emptiness with positive energy, strength, hope and faith in a power much stronger than myself. As I continue this journey my closest friends and family members will notice drastic changes. Some changes they will like and some not so much, but I know if it were not for these changes I would not continue my road to success, recovery and a life of true serene happiness. Bless up, rise up! Tomorrow is another day to create what you will.
Scott Rowley South Sister Summit
On 5/11/13 I set out to ski climb South Sister. My adventure quickly went off course. I ended up on top of Devils Hill, where an epiphany smacked me square in the face. Sitting on top of the hill something in my head told me that if I am to continue living a life that is largely absorbed by alcohol and pot then I will quickly end up in a very dark place. To put things simply..... I am not a person whom can handle these kinds of habits. That morning I packed up, went back to town and entered myself into AA and NA. Not by another persons will or demand, but rather my own. This journey has just begun. I will continue to travel peaks and valleys. Some days will be harder than others, but with hope, faith, love and the right tools I will conquer this inner demon. Today, I went back back to South Sister. This time with a clearer head and different mindset. I no longer felt alone. My friend Rex and I left the trail head at 2:15 am and we were quickly thrown off route. It was as if my demon wanted us to go back to Devils Hill. This side track resulted in an additional 700 feet vertical of climbing, wasted energy and a doubt that we were going to make the summit. Voices in my head persisted to tell me that I was not alone and we were going to conquer the mountain. I was not going back to the same dark place I was three days prior. The sun began to rise as we scaled the ridge that drops into Moraine Lake. We were back on track and the summit was in sight. Thousands of feet above us sat a peak that would be our destiny for this day. En route to the top I kept hearing people telling me things about myself that i'd never thought before. I kept thinking about all the moments that i'd messed up and people i'd hurt along the way. We reached the summit, skis and all at roughly 10 am. We were climbing for 8 hours. Exhaustion felt like an understatement, but for the first time in a long time I was at peace. I had absorbed myself into something far greater than myself and started to regain hope in a life that is truly amazing. It was reaffirming to sit on the summit and reflect on my decision to get sober and stay sober for the rest of my life. "A powerful, positive day awaits! Rise up!" |
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